i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
