Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
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