Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
He better not be in your backpack
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
