And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
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I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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