so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
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