sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize