It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
only you would photoshop your dick
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
