peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
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