On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize