I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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