That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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