I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
look no pants
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
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