What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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