He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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