Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Randomize
