walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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