we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize
