thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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