my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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