I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize