Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
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Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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