when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
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The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
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4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
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