I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
