Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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