she was so not down for the gang bang
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
