mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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