I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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