I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
