Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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