oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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