oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
If I die, sorry about rent.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
