i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Randomize
