Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
