At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Randomize
