I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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