Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I smell stomach acid.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its about making memories worth repressing
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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