After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
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