You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
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