New low: just hacked my moms facebook
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
