Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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