the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Randomize
