don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
