i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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