Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
We have started to decorate penises.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
