I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Randomize
