return my video game
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
