i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Randomize
