Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
