absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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