i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?