Buhtt sex?
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
i think im in europe. pls send help
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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