I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Randomize
