My liver just broke up with me...
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
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